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By MARY WHITE, Love Stories
Talent: The natural endowments of a person; gifts.
For as long as I can remember, something magic has happened when kids and I meet. I don't fully understand it, but it's always been true. And while I anger some and annoy some (mostly my own), children are generally drawn to me. Once in awhile — not a lot, but sometimes — I will greet a child (usually a small one) who will look into my face with astonishment. I can almost hear their intake of breath as they search my face, with wide eyes. I have pondered whatever this is for a very long time, and I think I finally know what they see. For the briefest of seconds, I think they see God; from the look on their face, he is a beautiful and welcome sight.
Wow, I must sound full of myself. But I believe that God gives each of us talents, each of us gifts that don't come through effort, but are merely given. To me, being with kids is like breathing. There's no effort. Like a perfect face, a musical voice or a mathematical brain, I believe that talents become a two-way mirror. God peeks through at us, and if we're paying close attention, we can peek back.
I would love to say that I've used my talent to better this world, to further God's purpose, but very often that has not been the case. Very often, I have merely used my talent for me.
A SPECIAL TEACHER
In the 20-plus years that I have worked with kids, I have shared families with a very special teacher. She has a talent, too, but it is a deeper talent, a better used one, with no room for her own glory. The first family that June Rogers and I shared was back in 1987. There were two brothers struggling under the constraints of past trauma, severe poverty, divorce and chronic neglect. June gave them structure, consistency, hygiene products, learning, clothing and food. She pushed them, demanded from them, listened to them, confronted their parents, fought with agencies and insisted that no one drop the ball under her watchful eye. The boys hated her and loved her and fought with her and cried in front of her and confided in her. And they felt safe with her.
June said two things to me then that forever changed how I viewed true talent. First, she said, "I am their teacher. It doesn't matter whether they love me or hate me. My job is to make sure that they have everything they need in order to learn."
Secondly, she said, "fair isn't getting what everyone else has. Fair is getting what you need."
TREADING WATER
In that moment, my goal became to work for kids the way June did, with no thought for myself, no hope for recognition.
As a result, I have officially changed the definition of "talent." Talent, as I see it, is the natural endowments of a person used for the glory of God and others.
It's funny to think that 20-plus years later, I still have the same goal. And I have made virtually no progress in reaching that goal. I am still feebly striving to get out of my own way to use my talent for others, to forget about me and to focus on them, to do the right thing even when it means I might be hated. In more than two decades, while I have tried really hard, I feel like I'm still treading water, still caught in the same undertow of my own lousy pride. It's funny to think that after 20-plus years, June doesn't even know that she's my hero. She has no idea. Because while teaching is absolutely one of her talents, I believe her truer gift is that she is oblivious to her own power. She's too busy looking at the kids, working for them, fighting for them; she just doesn't have time to be admired by people like me.
Mary White is from the Malone area. She and her husband have five children, eight cats, two dogs and three guinea pigs. She has had the privilege of working with children and families (her own and other people's) for more than 20 years.
