By STEPHEN BARTLETT
PLATTSBURGH -- Brandon Bedard watches his feet when he walks the halls of Northeastern Clinton Central School.
The high-school senior tries not to talk to people and avoids pep rallies.
He'd hide his face altogether if he could, to prevent people from seeing the pimples dotting it.
"It's disgusting," he said.
But his acne will be seen by millions when Bedard stars in an episode of MTV's "True Life," a documentary series running since 1998 that follows topics of interest to young people -- in Bedard's case, acne.
"It was a little awkward," he said of the camera crew that followed him around for a couple days.
Over the years, "True Life" has featured an array of topics, including drug use, adult-film stars, plastic surgery, phobias, eating disorders, sexual orientation and celibacy.
Bedard watches the show and responded to a request for people struggling with severe acne.
"I've had it since 14."
The condition leaves him feeling isolated.
He avoids conversations with classmates and doesn't look up much in school.
"I never get close to people," Bedard said. "It's definitely been a barrier."
He hasn't been picked on that much about it and admits his insecurities stem from within, yet he can't shrug off the feeling that everyone is staring at him.
"It's more self conscious than anything. It's self induced."
Still, acne has altered his life.
"When we have school activities, I don't participate. I feel really uncomfortable."
The friends he has aren't of his own making.
"They approached me. They came up to me and talked to me first."
Fortunately, his close friends are non-judgmental.
The MTV camera crew followed Bedard for two days, with one stop a meal at Michigans Plus, an eatery on Cornelia Street owned by Liz Cummings.
"That was kind of strange," Bedard said. "My principal was there."
He felt weird when they followed him around the mall and later to Taboo, a night club in the City of Plattsburgh.
Over the weekend, they filmed him at the Community Prom, an event created by students to offer a setting where youths who feel like outsiders can mingle without being picked on for their perceived differences.
Bedard has tried nearly every acne treatment available, but nothing has cleared up his face. He plans to try Accutane or Isotretinoin, used only as a last resort because those drugs have possible adverse effects, such as muscular dystrophy, cuticle infections, nose bleeds and, in rare cases, cataracts, inflammatory bowel disease and impotence.
This treatment for severe acne requires a prescription in America, though it is widely distributed illegally across borders by other countries with fewer restrictions.
"I really hope this helps," Bedard said.
Life has improved somewhat over the past year, but he has yet to walk with his head held high.
"I still feel isolated."
sbartlett@pressrepublican.com
